How to Save Money and Your Health as a Single Parent
Whether you’re newly single, have been doing it for a while or facing the possibility, these tips will help.
*Trigger Warning: this post does mention abuse but doesn’t go into the details.
Note: If you like freebies and discounts, check out how to get a $100 cash bonus from ING, $15 from Up Bank or have a look at the full list of freebies, offers and discounts for every state.
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1. Practice Self-Care
Self-care is NOT having a bath uninterrupted or something basic like that, although those things are good.
So much of what is suggested for mothers as self-care is what they should simply be able to do and it’s ridiculous.
That’s not to say a bath on your own or time out isn’t great, it is definitely needed.
But you should be able to pee or shower in peace without it being called “self-care”.
Take care of your physical and mental health as a baseline as well as you can.
Write a list of things you enjoy doing, did enjoy before kids or want to try and start doing them.
Pick up your hobbies again and do things for yourself e.g. 10 hobbies that make or save you money.
2. Get Your Finances in Order
A spending plan/budget can be basic. The main thing is knowing what money is coming in, what money is going out and learning where you are leaking money so you can stop it.
For many, a strong focus for finances is how to increase income and get off Centrelink.
Read how to create and stick to a budget even as a single parent.
43 ways for single mums to make money is a great start for increasing your income.
If you are looking at switching your banking, ING offers a $100 bonus with a few steps and Up Bank has $15 instantly when you open a new account.
3. Cultivate Your Support Network
You know the saying “It takes a village to raise a child.”
These days it is much harder because many of us move away from our family for work or struggle to find friends in new locations.
Everyone needs a support network, friends they can rely on or call, people they can go out with and other adults your children trust.
Sports teams, church, classes, parents of your kids friends etc. All of these are great places to find friends and grow your community.
Do what you can to create your own village.
4. Claim Whatever You Can
If you are claiming anything from Centrelink, be sure to check all your entitlements.
The entitlements or benefits aren’t only with them, they connect you with other organisations too.
There are discounts available on numerous things from electricity to registration.
Check out how to survive on Centrelink for more.
5. Know What is Available
So much help is available through various organisations such as legal aid, community pantries, electricity bill payments, NILS etc.
It takes a bit of research but it is worth it to know what help is available to you as a single parent.
If you are leaving an abusive relationship, many banks and other services you are signed up for have extra help available too.
6. Don’t be too Proud
Too often we are ashamed of our circumstances so we don’t seek the help we need.
You don’t want anyone to know what had happened or feel like you shouldn’t be in this situation.
Asking for help isn’t a weakness and accessing resources that are available is not something to be ashamed of.
It is ok to ask for help and access all the services available. That’s what they are there for.
7. Sort Your Routine
Routines don’t always go as planned but having some sort of structure can make things run smoother and free up your mental space.
Think about what makes you feel better in the morning and makes life easier then start crafting your morning routine around that.
The night before, do what you can to prepare for the next day such as get clothes out, pack lunches, do a quick clean etc.
Have a routine for the kids to get ready every morning, use visuals if it helps. As they get used to it, mornings should get easier.
8. Find Ways to Make Money
Financial stress is a huge issue for everyone right now and even moreso for single parents.
How can you afford everything, especially if they are relying on Centrelink, child support isn’t happening or their child has medical needs?
Check out:
How I made $33,277.57 on the side in 12 months
43 ways for single mums to make money
22 ways to make money on the side in 2022
9. Plan for the Future
Often we get caught up in the now, so focused on how we will pay the next bill that we can forget to budget and plan.
Soon debts, bills and everything else piles up causing a lot of stress. Sit down and take the time to make a plan for your future.
You don’t want to get to retirement age and have nothing. The sooner you start, the sooner compound interest can work for you.
Look at your net worth and how to increase it.
What does life look like to you as your kids get older then go on with their own lives?
Think about what career you want, the lifestyle you want, who is paying for university if they go, do you want to be able to lend them money etc. The kids will not be in your home forever.
Read 6 tips to easily clear debt. Also, look at how to do an annual financial review for some tips to get your finances sorted and plan better for the future.
10. Treat Child Support as a Bonus
While the other parent absolutely should pay, too many try to get out of it by doing cash jobs or their own business and lying about their income.
Often, the parent with the children has to cover all the expenses, take the time off work and the deal with the financial blows.
When or if they get child support. that amount is replenishing what was already spent. It never covers the full or even half the cost of what has already been spent.
By not including it in your budget, you won’t be on an emotional rollercoaster each month, wondering if it will be paid and having to juggle things if it doesn’t come.
If you aren’t budgeting for child support, when/if you get it, you can invest it and grow your wealth.
Also, child support eventually ends, so it is good not to depend on it.
11. Get Things for Free
There are so many things out there for free. Check out our huge list of birthday freebies including food, discounts and more.
Also, this list of freebies for Aussies and 50 ways to live for free.
Join pay it forward and similar groups on Facebook. Look on Marketplace for free items.
Let friends and family know what you are looking for.
You can get so many things for free from food through to accommodation.
12. Heal Before Dating
Too many people jump straight into a relationship without healing at all from previous relationships, trauma or issues.
If you move too fast, you will more than likely end up hurt again.
Get counselling if you need it. Read books, listen to podcasts, do courses, whatever it is you need to know yourself better and to heal.
Often, we repeat the same mistakes in every relationship because we haven’t done the healing work.
Without that work, we repeat behaviours and attract the same type of partners.
You can also miss all the red flags if you have not healed or learnt about your patterns.
13. Your Life Your Choice
Don’t let anyone pressure you into anything.
You are the one responsible for your life, your kids and what you do.
Obviously, everywhere has rules and you need to raise and teach your kids, be an example and a parent. But you can still have your own life.
Check out 18 time-saving tips for busy mums.
14. Keep on top of Your Career
It can be hard as a single parent trying to continue work but it will be worth it.
Continuing with your career means you are earning superannuation, promotions continue and your earning capacity increases faster than if you take time out.
Courses, promotions, switching companies to get better jobs are all valuable long term.
Superannuation works better for you the sooner you start which is why staying in your career is important.
Investing in yourself this way will reap huge rewards.
Yes, you want to spend time with your kids and enjoy their childhood.
Keep a balance between career and family life so your finances don’t suffer when the kids leave home.
15. Keep Training
Along with your career, keep increasing your skills and staying relevant. Or if you want to change careers completely, do any courses asap. There will always be a reason or an excuse as to why you put things off but the more you do, the longer you’ll stay where you are.
The time passes anyway. If you want a degree, get the degree. If you want any qualifications, get them. You are worth it and deserve to take the time to increase your knowledge and earning potential.
16. Childcare is Ok
Many mothers struggle with the idea of putting their kids into childcare, or it is difficult to get a placement anywhere.
It is ok to put your kids in childcare so you can provide financially.
Make sure you spend quality time with them outside of it.
Do your research and select the childcare option that works best for your family such as daycare, after school care, a nanny, an au pair or childcare swaps with friends and family.
17. Learn Their Love Language
Read The 5 Love Languages (there is a specific children’s version here too). If you’ve never read it or heard of it, it will be eye-opening. The idea is we all have one or a combination of these 5 love languages.
They are based on trauma so keep that in mind.
Most people find them useful though.
18. Make Childhood Special with Memories
It doesn’t need to be expensive for your kids to have a great childhood. Most of the things we’ve done were free or are rituals/traditions. Check out How to be close to your kids without spending a fortune.
Also, check out the real cost of raising kids and how to reduce it.
19. Learn to say No
So simple, yet so hard. Learn to say no. You don’t have to do everything everyone asks, be everywhere or drop everything for anyone else.
Own your time, decide what you will and won’t do then say no to anything that doesn’t work for you. No is a complete sentence. You don’t need to give reasons or excuses. Simply say no.
Read 18 time-saving tips for busy mums for more.
20. Be open. Be Vulnerable.
After a relationship breakdown, we often close ourselves off because we feel hurt, our self-esteem is probably low and we are questioning things in life. If you need, get therapy and be open and vulnerable.
Take time to heal as mentioned earlier then when or if you do decide to go into a relationship again, be open and vulnerable but cautious too. Use the skills you learn to create a better life for yourself and don’t accept anything less.
When it comes to healing and rebuilding, being open and vulnerable with safe people such as charities, community help, churches etc can be hugely beneficial. Your support network can only help if they know what you need, so don’t be afraid to ask for help.
21. Prioritise Health
Numerous single parents suffer because they ignored the warning signs their bodies were giving them.
Increasing exercise, eating healthy, nutritious and healing foods is important.
When you are healthy, mentally and physically, you parent better.
If you get sick or have to go to the hospital what will happen? Can your family go on and be fine or do you do everything?
As a single parent, it usually falls all on your shoulders. So you need to make sure you’re fit, strong and healthy.
22. Know the Life you Want and Make it Happen
It’s easy to get lost in the humdrum of life, especially as a single parent. The kids all have school, various activities, you might work or have a business and be asked/expected to help with school, sports or anything else your kids are involved in.
Before you know it a year or 5 have passed and you feel lost. You feel as if your life is no longer yours.
Decide now what you want your life to look like and how you can make that happen. It might not change overnight but unless you have a clear goal on the life you want, nothing will change for the better.
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