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What Causes Relationship Breakdown?

What Causes Relationship Breakdown?

6 Causes of Causes Relationship Breakdown and Frugal Tips to Help

Relationships are complicated and when they break down, it can get complicated, not to mention expensive.

Splitting assets, fighting over custody and other aspects if you have kids can add up fast.

If it’s an amicable breakup, that’s different but sadly, most are not amicable though and that’s where it gets harder.

A relationship ending doesn’t only impact finances, it takes an emotional toll, no matter what the reason is for it ending.

Fortunately, researchers are getting a handle on the reasons for relationship breakdowns and how to fix it.

Once you understand the fundamental principles, you are in a better position to pull yourself out of a dip and get back on track, provided there isn’t abuse.

I want to make it explicitly clear that if there is abuse, you need to make a plan to leave.

Also, if you are the only one putting in effort to fix the relationship or there is infidelity or addiction, it is likely best to end the relationship.

Here are some of the main causes of relationship breakdowns and how you can address them frugally if you want to fix things.

6 Causes of Causes Relationship Breakdown and Frugal Tips to Help

1. Different Values

A significant driver of relationship breakdown is divergent values.

You may have beliefs in one direction, and your partner might have beliefs in another. 

At the beginning of the relationship, you might not notice how different your values are.

However, it can grow larger over time, leading to a sense of incompatibility and conflict. 

Differences in values can impact every area of your life, including finances, relationships with others, your health, goals that you want to achieve etc.

Sometimes you are living in a way that doesn’t align with our core values and you need to reflect on your lives, your values and make changes.

If you know your core values and start living them, it can make a drastic difference in the relationship.

But if you have both reviewed your values and they don’t align, it might be best to end the relationship.

You can try counselling and working towards a common goal but strongly different values can be too much for a relationship to overcome.

6 Causes of Causes Relationship Breakdown and Frugal Tips to Help

2. Financial Issues

For the most part, financial issues often stem from a difference in values or goals or upbringing.

Although, occasionally, financial issues can happen due to extreme medical issues or job loss putting financial strain on the family budget.

Having financial issues can make any other small problems seem insurmountable.

Financial counselling can help significantly and making sure you are both on the same page financially.

Getting help with any debt, doing what you can to improve your finances, find a new job, improving your health etc are all important too.

Although, sometimes those things are harder than you might think but it’s worth trying.

Check out 6 tips to easily reduce debt (which includes tips for dealing with debt collectors).

Also, 24 ways to make money on the side, 24 ways to easily save money and tips to survive job loss.

6 Causes of Causes Relationship Breakdown and Frugal Tips to Help

3. External Pressures

Another reason spouses go to a family lawyer is external pressures on the relationship such as family members not approving or constant issues with friends/in-laws/work.

Problems at work or challenging social circles can cause a relationship breakdown if one party is under stress or strain or puts too much stock in those external influences. 

Again, this situation depends on the personalities of the people involved and how willing they are to work on it.

If the relationship is already highly strung, these external factors can amplify problems. 

Fortunately, problems at work or in other relationships can be relatively simple to resolve by switching jobs or finding new friends.

But the underlying causes of why you or your partner took so much of what others said and did on board will still need to be addressed.

Often counselling is needed for this to be sorted.

6 Causes of Causes Relationship Breakdown and Frugal Tips to Help

4. Emotional Disconnect

You can also sometimes get a situation where one or both parties in the relationship emotionally disconnect from each other.

This is commonly listed as one of the leading causes of relationship breakdown yet if recognised early, can be easy to fix.

You might feel a lack of intimacy with your partner, or vice versa. 

Not having this deep emotional connection is okay for some people, but it can leave others feeling unfulfilled.

Communication is key and it’s not just about talking endlessly.

Developing intimacy involves some talking but it’s also noticing the needs of each other, supporting each other and working together.

Non-sexual touch, spending time together doing hobbies and making it a priority to connect.

Try the 36 questions that lead to love to get you started, look at these 25 free and cheap date ideas to try to do things together again and look at other ways you can connect.

6 Causes of Causes Relationship Breakdown and Frugal Tips to Help

5. Lack Of Trust

Trust can also play a substantial role in relationship breakdown.

When one party doesn’t give the other the benefit of the doubt, it can lead to extreme tension, anger, and fear. 

However, in most cases, if one partner suspects something, there’s usually a reason and it’s usually right.

If there cause of jealousy comes from past experiences and not the present relationship, that needs to be addressed.

But if it is jealousy or feelings of unease within the relationship only, trust yourself.

Look at ways to build trust and work on it if you both feel the relationship is worth it.

Without trust, a relationship cannot work and if there is no trust due to issues from your past that can be fixed and a relationship grow stronger.

6 Causes of Causes Relationship Breakdown and Frugal Tips to Help

6. Communication Problems

Finally, communication breakdowns can make relationships more challenging.

Constant arguing or lack of honest expression makes it harder for the relationship to feel genuine.

It can also get in the way of dealing with challenges when they inevitably come.

Your childhood can greatly impact your attachment style and how you communicate which in turn impacts the relationship.

Learn about your attachment style and work towards improving communication within your relationship.

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